20+ [Funny] Chris D’elia Quotes (Of All Time) 2023

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Chris D’elia Quotes : If you are interested in comedy then you must’ve heard about the ever famous American comedian Chris D’Elia, a stand-up comedian and actor.


In this article, we bring you the best of Chris D’elia quotes today! So, get ready as we unveil some iconic statements from the famous Chris D’elia.

Let’s get started…

Who is Chris D’elia?

Christopher William D’Elia was born on March 29, 1980, in New Jersey. He is an American stand-up comedian, actor, podcast host, and writer. 

Let me tell you…

His parents are Television directors and interior decorators, no doubt he got his acting skills from home for the media industry. 


Chris D’elia is primarily famous for his very successful roles, such as Alex Miller in Whitney,” Danny Burton in Undateable,” Kenny onThe Good Doctor,” and an incredible one being Henderson in the TV series You.”

Chris D’elia Career

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D’ Elia started his career at a young age when he appeared as a guest-starring part on Chicago Hope.” Later on, he continued his education and joined New York University but dropped out due to personal purposes as he could not develop an interest. 

Moving on…

He appeared in a movie that went to DVD, after which he decided he wanted to be a stand-up comedian. 

Chris started comedy in 2006 and appeared in many shows such as Comedy Central’s Live at Gotham,” “Comedy Central Presents,” and Glory Daze.” 

Let me tell you something interesting…

He developed an interest in podcasts, too, as he hosted “Ten Minute Podcast,” “Congratulations with Chris D’Elia,” and more. 

Without further ado… 

Let’s move on to the best part of this article, Chris D’elia quotes! 

Chris D’Elia Quote # 01

We’re the only species that listen to Michael Bublé when we have sex. Fuck, That sign is wrong.”

Quote # 02

“Live life to the fullest.”

Chris D’elia Quotes

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Quote # 03

A girl who pays attention is very cool. It’s tough to pay attention to someone. I understand. I get it. I get bored a lot when I’m talking to people, but I try. So I’d like for the girl to try, too.”.

Quote # 04

No perfume. Because I want to know how you smell – right off the bat, don’t mask it up. I need to know how you smell because I need to understand how we connect. A smell is a big thing. Pheromones. Don’t cover that.“

Chris D’Elia Quote # 05

Every guy is different, but just prepare to know him differently and be OK with it, because the times I’ve lived with girls, and I’ve lived with some adorable girls, I felt terrible that they had to live with me. Somebody needs to understand this” 

Quote # 06

I think that men think they need their man caves. They don’t. They think they want them, and then the second people get them, and they have alone time and time away from the girl, and the girl is cool with giving them alone time, then that’s when they, or at least I, start to think, “So, why are you so cool with me being alone? What’s wrong with me that you don’t want to be with me every second?” 

Chris D’elia Quotes

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Quote # 07

I never really feel like just standing there and telling jokes. I want to move around. It’s hard for me to write a track where I don’t end up on the ground for some reason. Hey, at least that way, I know no comics will steal my tricks. Too many bruises.” 

Quote # 08

Women tend to talk more than men, and they do this thing where they say something that can easily be shown. Like, they don’t need to do that.” 

Quote # 09

Once I started doing stand-up, everything fell into place. That was when I started acting more; I felt like I’d found my place in the business.” 

Chris D’elia Quotes

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Quote # 10

“People that workout and won’t shut the fuck up about it. I cannot stand that shit. You don’t matter that much, okay?” “Like, you’re not doing much, okay? Who the fuck are you inspiring? All you do is move weight around and eat extra chicken, right? 

Quote # 11

“I’m not interested in being one of those comedians who wants to look good and be this ‘cool’ funny person. I don’t care how weird or ugly I look.” 

Quote # 12

“In Paris, choosing a dress is a monumental decision. In Milan, it’s a kick.”

Quote # 13

“I never really write the jokes. I just sit down over a week or two and try to figure out what I want to talk about. Once I narrow that down, then I start working on the material, like “How do I make this stuff funny?” 

Quote # 14

I’m a selfish person, and I’m going onstage to have a good time, and I’d love it if you want to be a part of it. So if people don’t get it, they’re wrong. I think they’re wrong, and I think they either don’t want to have a good time or they just don’t like my style.”

Ethan Klein Quote # 15

“I definitely am a performer, and there are different styles of stand-up; I mean, some people are writers and they get onstage to get jokes out, and that’s definitely not what I do. I like to just go up and, if I’m telling a story about someone, I’ll play his or her part.”

Quote # 16

“Being on ‘Whitney’ is a job, but stand-up is my life. I could never stop. There’s an art to it. I love having strangers laugh with me, so as long as I can continue doing that, I’ll be happy. Working on a show and collectively sharing ideas with a cast is great, but stand-up is my first love.” 

Quote # 17

“I would never say that I’m good at being on dates. I think I like to try to find a connection with somebody, like, that’s my main thing. I think that maybe if you find a connection with a girl on a date, that’s like the No. 1 thing, and then it’s like, ‘Cool, that was a great date.’

Chris D’elia Quotes

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Quote # 18

“Don’t waste life on nothing, enjoy life.”

Quote # 19

“I’m a dude, obviously, and when I’m not in a relationship, I don’t do laundry until I want to. But if I live with a girl, you have to do it when she wants to or when we want to, which sucks.”

Chris D’Elia Quote # 20

“My biggest pet peeve is when a girl says, “I’m not into drama.” Why are you even mentioning it?! That’s dramatic in itself!”

Conclusion: Chris D’elia Quotes 

I hope you enjoyed our Chris D’elia quotes! Chris really is an awesome guy, his words are true to life which most of us can relate. I bet you had a good time reading a few of his iconic quotes from our list.

In case, you want more of his content…

You can keep yourself updated with how Chris D’elia lives his life and how he spends his money by reading his Net Worth, Biography & Lifestyle on our website, Bouncemojo.com.

Check Out: Chris D’Elia: White Male. Black Comic.

As we always say…

Put the Bounce in your Mojo today!


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